March
11, 1999. Thursday.
I have a confession to make. Before you judge me too quickly, hear me out. Ok, here goes...
Yesterday the government granted liberal leave for government employees. So I didn't really have to come in yesterday. But I didn't want to waste a vacation day, so I came in. But I think if Berry had stayed home, I probably would've as well. You see, Berry has a computer with a dial-up internet connection. So I can access the internet from home with her computer. But she decided to go to work just a little late, meaning she'd be long gone after I woke from my resumed sleep. So i decided that I'd be incredibly bored at home, so i came to work. Yes, that's right... I admit it! I admit it already!!
My descent into geekdom
is nearly complete. The only thing stopping me is my own shabby computer
skills. I can make a webpage, sure, but I don't know any really cool tricks.
Thank god. Until then, I can't really, truly be called a geek.
Maybe a geek in spirit. I guess you could say that I aspire to reach
geekdom, in the same way that Minor Leaguers wanna reach the Majors, apprentices
want to become Masters, and Christians wanna kill the Jews. wait...
Anyway, I revealed this sad revelation to Berry
and Brooke last night, and she told me how pathetic that was. But it wasn't
just to update my webpage, you see. There were other things that I wanted
to do on the net. Lotsa reading that I'm accustomed to doing daily.
I woulda missed it. Plus, I really wanted to finish my Index
of frequently used Nouns, which I did.
Anyway, Berry, Brooke, and I went out for sushi last night. I always
like going out for sushi with people that haven't had it before, because
that usually means that some extra food will be coming my way. People
usually decide to be brave and chicken out, or order too much. I
basically have a bottomless pit of a stomach when it comes to raw fish.
I can never leave any on the table, even if I feel like I'm gonna explode.
It's a lot like consuming alcohol. You just feel good, so you just
keep drinking and drinking, even past the point wehre it stops doing you
good and starts to be detrimental and even vomit-inducing. I guess you
could say that I get drunk on fish. mmm... fish...
But Brooke didn't
order that much, so there wasn't anythiing left to scavenge. So I
actaully had to pay for my food. Can ya believe that shit?
I just got a call from Berry. It seems that someone broke into her car last night. Her sister was on her way to an interview when she came and told Berry that the window was broken, and the stereo and cell-phone were gone. That sucks. It's kinda scary, too. My car was parked like 3 spots from hers. Fortunately, removing a stereo from my particular brand of car is an extremely time consuming chore, even for the experienced car thief. It doesn't just slide in and out. It requires the removal of several panels and multiple screws. I'd say that the fastest one could do the job would be about about 6 minutes, because you have to dissconnect and remove a buncha other stuff before you can even get the first panel outta the way to get to the stereo. Then, the screws are so deep into the dashboard, you'd need a really long screwdriver and probably a flashlight to do the job. Even if you were to do the sloppiest job possible, ripping the wires out and disregarding where the screws landed ( as I'm sure any thief would), the car alarm would be going on for at least 6 minutes. Apparently my building has some policy that they'll tow your car if the alarm is going off too long. I guess Berry's alarm didn't go off at all. I sure didn't hear anything. i can't believe someone would just go into the snow-filled lot at break into her car. If I were a thief, I'd at least wait until the weather was warmer, so I'd have a better selection of cars to choose from. I mean, at least half of the cars in the lot hadn't been moved since Tuesday, and were buried under 11 inches of snow. Then again, maybe they'd scoped out her car already, and thought yesterday would be the most opportune time. Whatever it is, it's fucked up. I guess I'll have to start being more carefull. This sucks, cause I felt kinda safe in my neighborhood, even though it's always kinda resembled the 'hood . There are some hoodlums that hang out in the grassy knoll out in front of the building, but i doubt it was them. Or I have no way of telling whether it was them or not. I guess I'm just gonna have to start popping some caps in some asses.
Something that i forgot to mention: last night: After our sushi
dinner the Weird Sisters and I went into Georgetown so that Berry could
fulfill the Icecream Requirement part of her evening. She was craving
Ben and Jerry's, or B&J's as she says, I myself don't much care
for them.. First of all, i don't like the weird-ass names of the flavors.
It's confusing. i feel like a dolt asking. It's tailored to
people "in the know." Also, the consistency of their ice cream is
a little too much like cookie dough. It's not s viscous as, say,
Haagen Das, which coincidentally is right across the street from B&J's
and whose ice cream has actual names like pralines and cream.
-side note: this guy that works here just gave me a piece of candy.
He gives me and Keenya candy almost everyday. I suppose it would usually
creep me out, but it doesn't. isn't it sad that my first reaction
to an act of kindness is to think that the guy is some sorta sicko?
well, as it turns out, this side note segues nicely into my next little
passage:
So as the Weird Sisters were finishing their semi-frozen treats, I was
standing outside of the shop waiting for them.
it was a little
uncomfortable because the way the stores are set up in Georgetown
iis tha a lot of them have doors set back about 7 feet from the sidewalk,
and there's sort of a hallway leading towards the door, where there're
windows and people sitting there, past the door and right next to the sidewalk.
So i'm standing right outside the door, essentially watching this random
couple eat their ice cream. So as i turn away from them, this dude
smoking a cigarette makes eye contact with me, looks shocked, stops, and
turns back the way he came. I thought maybe I was intruding on his
turf or something. So anyway, the Weird Sisters finally came out, and we
of course had to go to Urban Outfitters. So i reluctantly
agree and walk the 30 feet down thstreet. And who do we pass on the
way? the same swarthy looking guy who saw me and left. I was actually
telling them about what happened when we ran into him. I ignored
him, but Brooked informed me that he was staring the shit outta me, giving
a sacry look. So we duck into Urban Outfitters. I go outside
to throw away my coffee and go back in. The guy comes in seconds
after me. And kinda just hovers around where we are. So Brooke
and I look at some books, and act really lovey-dovey like we're together,
laughing and gaffawing like fools at the stupidest shit. the guy
keeps hovering. So i walk with berry to the other side of the store, then
head downstairs to check out the selection of siny shirts and funny pants.
I'm down there for maybe 30 seconds when the guy comes down. By now he
was with a female companion, which made me feel a little better, but not
much. I walked around the store cautiously, always looking around
for him. eventually i lost him somewhere in the store. But when Berry
and Brooke came down, he wasn't far behind. I thought maybe he'd
wait for me to come upstairs, since I'd have to in order to leave the store.
But he was much more active in his pursuit. I was actually on my
way up the stairs with the Sisters when he was on his way down. I
froze. I turned around and just pretended to look at some glass with
Chinese writing on them. Then i got the hell outta there.
Lately, well, for the past year or so, I've had a small notion that I'm
being watched. Before I had a fear that I was being watched by people from
the future that were out to stop me, from what I don't know. That was particularly
disconcerting because if they were from the future they could come back
in time as much as they want, making an infinite number of attempts to
"stop me." But that fear has passed. But i do still feel like
i'm being watched. Yesterday only fuled my paranoia. Whenever
I see someone walking beind me, I imagine that they're from some government
agency following me. Usually it's people from the government? Was
is that?. What's wrong with me? I think i've sen way too many movies.
During the nervous walk back to the car, i pretended that the guy was following
us and started sprinting up the hill. berry said it made her heart
skip a beat. Brooke said that her lungs heart, and that her heart
was "taking a licking." To this i replied, "wouldn't it be weird
if I actually licked your heart?"
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