June 13th, 2001.  Wednesday
 

    It's been a very busy couple of days.  The specter of my impending Kaplan humiliation weighed heavily on me for the past 48 hours, and it was hard for me to really enjoy anything.  Which was disappointing, since I had a party to go to last night.
    The party was thrown by the magazine where I interned all those long months, at the hip New York club nightclub Spa.  It was an especially hip night to be at Spa, because a scandalous feature about it ran on the front page of the New York Post yesterday.  The headline read NO 'COVER' AT THIS YUPPIE SEX CLUB.  Apparently, there was a lot of stripping and a few public sex acts performed there over the weekend.  I wouldn't call it a "sex club" though.  Though maybe I've just been there on the wrong nights.  I never really go to clubs, but I've been to Spa three times.  The only club I've ever been to more than once.  And the one I like the least.  It's really small.  Anyway, my friend Johanna still works at the magazine, so she put me on the VIP list, and i took Matt and roommate Dylan along.  There wasn't anything particularly special about the VIP room.  The last time I was there, it wasn't even the VIP room, just another room. But I guess they had to make something more exclusive.  So that made us feel a lot cooler.  There wasn't much in the way of celebrities though.  Carson Daly showed up and left after about 20 minutes.  Matt was particularly impressed when ex-New Kid on the Block Joey Macintyre showed up.  Matt struck up a conversation with him, telling Joey that he'd ruined Matt's life when his girlfriend, back when she was 14, fell in love with him.  Then went into more elaborate details.  It was all a lie, or course, but Joey seemed sort of amused by it all.  Matt claims that for a brief period in his life, people often told him he looked like Joey.  Later on Matt talked to one of the lesser Wayans brothers. I think it was Marlon.
    Anyway, the party was generally a good time.  Lots of meat heads and the normal sorts of idiots and cheesy fucks you'd expect to find in a New York club.  I mostly just hung out with Matt and Dylan and my friends from the magazine.  As we were getting ready to leave, I struck up a conversation with a bored looking black girl holding a camera, who turned out ot be taking pictures of the event for Variety.  I asked her to take my picture, saying that that could be my big break.  She laughed, and didn't touch her camera.  She was a pretty interesting girl though, and seemed like the most approachable girl in the joint based on the fact that she was sitting there by herself and clearly did not want to be anywhere near the club.  She just works freelance, from what I gathered. She said she was a dancer, with a company going to Ghana in July.  So I just sat there for a while, chatting, and laughing at some random people, voicing my pleasure in knowing that they would probably never bread and there weirdness would be halted in a most Darwinian fashion.  Anyway, it was a not-unpleasant encounter.
    So after that, I found Matt and we sat down on some couches, cooling off under the blast of air coming down from the AC ducts.  Feeling bold, I thought I'd start talking to more people, after not talking to anyone all night.  By now it was two, and I'd hoisted a few drinks, so I turned to the girl next to me, wearing a sparkly camouflage halter top, tapped her on the shoulder and said "Pardon me, can I ask you a question?"  "What?" she said. So I said "Does all this wind blowing around me make everything I do look more...dramatic?"  She kind of cringed, and mumbled something to the effect of "Idontknow" and shrugged and just turned the other way.  That probably should've been at least a little embarrassing, but I didn't really care.  So we just kept sitting there. It would've been to defeatist to just get up and go.  And it's not like I was trying to pick her up or anything. I just thought it was funny and I wanted to unload it on someone.  That someone just happened to be the really hot girl sitting next to me.  Anyway, any person I'd want to know would've found that amusing, so I'm not going to get too bent out of shape by being blown off by some trendy, no sense of humor dame.  So Matt and I sat around for a bit, then took off.
    So I spent most of the day today helping my brother Geoff move his stuff into his new apartment on the Upper West Side.  Of course, today was the hottest and muggiest day yet, so the task was extra unpleasant.  And I was freaking out about having to go to my Kaplan teacher training class.  It weighs heavily on my mind.  I didn't want to fuck it up. But I didn't even want to go.  But I couldn't stand the fact that I didn't want to go because I was scared.  So I went.  And though I thought I didn't prepare enough, it went well.  The only bad thing that the instructor said about my presentation was that I needed to pay a tad more attention to some of the smaller details, and I need to work on my "liveliness."  We had our one-on-one consultations afterwards, and she said I'd probably make it through with now problems.  That was something of a mild surprise.  But a pleasant one.  And it's amazing how much better I feel now.  Not just for doing well, but for preparing for it and going and just doing it, especially since I was so against going after my perceived disaster two days before.  Still, it is a bit worrisome that I talk in a really monotonous voice when I'm nervous.  It's almost robotic.  I wonder why I never noticed it before. I hope it's not some new neurological disorder I'm developing.
    Anyway, Geoff's apartment is pretty nice.  He was mention that it's pretty weird that now we're living almost an hour apart.  Though only about 8 miles.  I barely saw him when he lived 7 blocks away, now he's an hour uptown.  Oh well. At least that's also Jen's neighborhood, so now I have another excuse to go gorge myself on Shepherd's pie at Big Nick's, my favorite Upper West greasy-spoon eatery.  You know what I really need to do now? Sleep.  My horoscope today started "Someone hasn't been getting enough sleep lately, Aries."  And for once, they're right, dammit.

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