I had all manner of weird dreams last night.  One involved a shirtless, 70's-era David Bowie.  the Ziggy Satrdust days I guess.  I was holding a stapler, and having a conversation about how I thought staples were sort of gay. I don't really know what that meant.  Anyway, later, after a few more random dreams, I was stapling with Rodzilla, and we were picking up the staples and looking at them, and one of us said "Hmmm. I guess staples aren't really that gay afterall."  So that was weird.
    In a dream between these two, I was fishing, and I caught this pretty large fish.  I had it on shore, and the hook fell out of its mouth. It was gasping for the huge chunk of food on the hook, still ignorant of the hook, and I needed a way to carry it, so I nudged the hook toward its mouth and then it bit into it, and felt the pain of the hook.  Anyway, I was dragging it along, and I was walking with my friends, and the fish started moaning and talking.  It was in pain, and it was asking me for help.  It actually said "kill me."  The whole dream was very disturbing.  So I was like "What should I do, should i cut off it's head?"  So i just grabbed the line and yanked it really quickly.  I heard the fish's bones snap, and then i looked down and it's eyes were all black.  But I think it was still alive.  It was really disturbing.
    So then I ended up in a bar, not Great Lakes, but my dream equivalent.  My famiiar, neighborhood bar where the bartenders all know us. Anyway, I stored the fish in a bathroom, then walked out to the bar.  And then i fell in a big whole under the middle of the bar, and stood there, my chest at floor level.
    Then all of a sudden I was sitting in a car with Rodzilla.  It was sort of the setting in Jurassic Park, where they were sitting in a van in the rain and the T Rex stomps up.  Anyway, in my dream it was also raining, and I think we were both shirtless.  She had her hand on my head, and asking me "How many times have you seen 'The Lost World'?"  And I said "I dunno, three or four times. How many times have you?"  "A few times.  Once with you."  And then I woke up.  All in all, my subconscious has been working overtime.  I really have no idea what it all means.

    So then I got up, let the dog out, and had a shower.  Then to the grocery store.  I bought some deli meat.  For not a lot.  Probably half of what I woulda paid in new york.  And how I love sandwiches.  Lovely things, really.  So then I went to the mall and bought a slushy and a pretzel, for the second day in a row.  If I'm ever fabulously wealthy, right after I put a bowling alley in my house, I'm getting a slushy machine.  I want one right now.  I think I may go get one after this, even though it's almost three am.  You can do that around here.
    So I spent the afternoon watching cartoons, drinking my slush, and then watching the Phillies season opener.  The baseball season beginning is always a bright spot for me.  It's one of the last things i still feel the same about since i was ten years old.  The feeling is exactly the same, the whole experience.  Especially since the Phillies have only had one winning season since then.  Maybe being a Phillies fan has affected me more than I thought.  I mean, when i watch the games, i always have low expectations, and even when things go well, I'm always waiting for things to go to shit.  Come to think of it, my summer of 1999 was going really well until August, when the Phillies, who were in contention for the playoffs, suddenly went to shit.  And they haven't recovered since. So here's hoping the fightin' Phils really get it together this year.  They won today, barely, in 13 innings.

    I really love driving and listening to music. I miss that a lot.  It's so nice and relaxing.

    So I've been watching Shakespeare in Love on cable for the past few hours.  I've wanted to see it for a while, but it's one of those movies where whenever I wanted to rent it, anybody who'd wanted to see it had already seen it.  So I'd never seen it.  And i really enjoyed it. Well, it's not over yet, but i've enjoyed what I've seen so far.  And Juliet just died, so I can't imagine it's got too much more to go.
 

    Anyway, my friend Jason took the day off from work today, so I went over to his place and we drove over to French Creek National Park.  He used to work there, and they have a frisbee golf course that we play a lot.  One of my favorite sports.  So we went out for out first game of the season.  It was muddy and gross and i was using an unfamiliar disc.  Anyway, I lost by about 12 strokes.  It wasn't pretty.
    Jason's getting married in July.  It's sort of weirding me out.  All this talk of mortgages and insurance and, though a long ways into the future, kids.  Just the talk of it.  Weirded me out mostly because of my distance from all that sort of thing.  My timetables and ideas of where I'd like to be in the next few years are all blown to hell.  And by "timetables," I just mean "hopes." That somehow makes it less disappointing.
    Ok, now I'm just getting myself all worked up and it's too late in the night to be doing that. So i just need to go to bed now.
 
 
 
 

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