The cold persists.  I felt fairly out of it all day today.  During the afternoon editorial meeting, I was sitting there in a feverish sweat for the better part of an hour.  Though I'm not sure if it was from the illness, or just my usual reaction to being called upon to speak in front of a room of people.  I usually break into a nervous sweat in those situations. So perhaps today was a combination of sickness and nervousness.  That's what I'm thinking, anyway.

    The cable modem was installed yesterday.  So far, only on Dylan's computer.  but i did manage to download the entire new Luna album, the Live! cd.  I find it hard to get excited by Luna these days, for the past year really.  But every time I see them live, I'm so glad I went.  The cd sounds great too.  Just like a live show, only I can sit down.  Reminds me why they're one of my all-time favorite bands in the world.  Excellent live band.  So I recommend it.  Really, quite excellent. Doing good things for me.  particularly with the addition of the new female bassists, who can sing the French lyrics to "Bonnie and Clyde."  That's hot.  That's right, I'll say it. H-O-T.  Hot.

    Since I wasn't at work yesterday, I emailed Johanna, whom i work with, a list of ideas for articles that I had to turn in.  As a "reward" for helping me out, also emailed her the rollover picture of the shirtless me that's on my frontpage here.  Today when I got to work, I found that picture as the desktop wallpaper on our shared computer.  Shortly after that, the managing editor came over and handed me a photo copy of the picture.  And later in the day Johanna made about ten more copies.  Funny girl.  Serves me right, I suppose.  for being a dumbass.
    Johanna did tell me that in another editorial meeting yesterday the head editor said the new issue was getting a lot of good press, particularly the article I wrote.  So that made me feel sort of good.

    I'm still not feeling too good about my situation there.  It's partly my fault, because I don't have any really good ideas, and I feel my standing slipping as the new, go-getter interns come up with all sorts of interesting shit.  I mean, I have established myself enough that I'm asked to write things, whereas before I'd just be researching.  A record review, a sort of book review.  These things add up I guess.  All into the portfolio.  But the situation sucks. I'm still an "intern" and that's not likely to change.  The money promised me hasn't arrived, and it's putting me in a sour mood.  I either need to be on staff, or leave.  As much as I like the fact that I'm writing for the magazine, and as much as I hate the idea of starting over somewhere else, there's no way I can keep this up.  I have an interview at Women's Day Special Interest Publications next Thursday.  That could very well be the end of me.  I hear there's not a lot of jobs in the magazine industry right now, so I guess I should take what I can get for now.  But come on.  Women's Day?  Ok, I'll admit it. I don't want to work there because I'm afraid I'll really, really like it.
 

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